Wednesday, July 13, 2011

We'll Always Have Spain...

This has been a pretty crazy week – and the thing is – it’s only Wednesday. So I will start from the beginning.
Ken and I flew back from an amazing trip to the Basque region of Spain on Sunday night.  We spent 10 days roaming around  the shores of San Sebastian, to the Rioja wine region…  we made a quick stop in Pamplona to run with the bulls (yes, you read that right. My husband can finally cross it off his bucket list) … and then we were off to Barcelona.
Needless to say it was a once-in-a-lifetime trip – truly great.  Lots of delicious food, wine, cocktails (they make a mean tableside gin and tonic) and of course lots of time not thinking about work and definitely no Blackberry’s (which is huge for my husband).
Of course no Blackberry means no access to email, which brings me to the rollercoaster of a week we’ve already had. On Monday, after cleaning out the 900-plus emails out of my work inbox, I checked my yahoo and came across an email from our agency featuring several new “waiting” children. These are kids who are waiting either due to their age of a medical condition.
And here’s where the trouble started. As soon as I opened it up…I gazed upon the most precious little face.  Ken and I had never even thought about adopting a waiting child, but this little peanut changed our mind instantly. I immediately emailed our case worker for additional information… and the race was on. I had 24 hours to contact an international adoption physician to review his medical records because another family had requested to be matched with him… and that matching meeting was scheduled to take place on Wednesday at noon.
The pressure was on, but I’m in news – and deadlines are my thing – so I wasn’t worried. On top of tracking down an adoption specialist, I connected with two other doctors who dropped everything to look through the paperwork. All of them gave us the thumbs up.
A few hours later – we threw our hat into the ring. Although both Ken and I were cautiously optimistic, it was nearly impossible to contain our excitement. It was coming out of my pores.  After all that we’ve been through – it could finally be time for us to be parents. Finally.
Today at work was excruciating. I spent it staring at the clock on the bottom right of my computer screen, waiting for the noon hour to pass, and then finally waiting for my phone to ring.
And finally… it did.
It was our case worker, who has a voice that I can’t tell either way if she’s delivering good news or bad, but a few words into our conversation… she said “I have some disappointing news.”
In the end, they chose the other family mainly based on the fact that they’ve been waiting longer. Mother F*****, I feel like we’ve been waiting a lifetime. But at the end of the day (as my husband loves to say) … at least this little one is getting a loving home. 

All good news.  I just wish it was our home.


But then again, we’ll always have Spain…….

5 comments:

  1. I know how tough this was on you and Ken but there's a reason for everything...right? I'm not sure the reason for this one -- but you're right..at least that little guy will have a home.

    I looked at every last one of those photos -- amazing! I felt like I was there with you guys -- except...now I want to go for myself! Thanks for sharing your journeys!

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  2. beautiful photos...am so impressed with the collection!!
    and a poignant accompanying story that you tell well...
    meant to be. it will happen.

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  3. I have added you to the Ethiopian Adoption Blogs. Sorry about the recent disappointment :(
    I will be wishing you the very best for your journey!

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  4. We also recently inquired about a waiting child for the first time. It was a very interesting, emotional experience. We decided not to pursue a match with that child, but it was an experience that will surely stick with us. I'm so sorry that it didn't work out this time. It is so hard to get your hopes up and then have them dashed.

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  5. Holding your excitement and disappointment in our hearts is what we do for you. It is your individual journey but you are not taking it alone. Everyone who knows and loves you and Ken are bearing witness with you. Wish we could do more but I'm a big believer in resting in the mystery since we don't have many other options. There is a good reason why this did not work out for you and your willingness to wish the other family well with this dear little life, demonstrates your wisdom and compassion, something you need a lot of as a parent. Val

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